SHIVANI: THE PRICE OF SURVIVAL

Saroja accompanied Shiva to a gender-affirming healthcare clinic after he asked her questions about hormonal treatment.

He had heard people speak about hormones as though they could change a person's entire body within days. He wanted to know what was true and what was merely rumor.

The doctor listened carefully.

“Hormone therapy can produce changes over time,” the doctor explained. “The effects vary from person to person. Some changes may begin within months, while others take years. There are also medical risks, so treatment requires proper assessment and monitoring.”

Shiva asked whether he could become physically feminine very quickly.

The doctor shook their head.

“There is no safe, guaranteed shortcut. Hormones do not replace surgery, and neither treatment should be undertaken because somebody else is pressuring you.”

The statement stayed with Shiva long after the appointment ended.

His mother had sent him away with instructions about the person she expected him to become. Saroja had introduced him to a life he had never considered. Now, for the first time, a professional was asking him to consider what he wanted.

Shiva left the clinic with information rather than a miraculous promise.

He understood that he did not need to rush into medical decisions to satisfy anyone.

Outside, Mumbai continued moving at its usual frantic pace. People hurried past the clinic, unaware that Shiva was quietly reconsidering the direction of his life.

He did not yet know whether he wanted to transition.

But he knew that any decision about his body would have to belong to him.