Part 11: A Year of Womanhood and a Future Chosen
The Final Year: Life as Pavithra:
By the time 12th standard began, Pavithra had fully settled into her new identity, though not without countless reminders of how her life had shifted in ways she never expected. Her mornings began early, now with a routine so distinctly feminine that she sometimes forgot she hadn’t always done it. From adjusting her bra straps, now larger to accommodate her noticeably fuller chest, to applying a soft dab of talcum powder on her back and shoulders to fight the heat under the school uniform - every detail mattered.
Her school uniform remained the same deep blue kurti and pants, but her body had continued to change. Her hips were now wider, thighs curvier, and she could no longer pass as a lean boy under the loose kurti. Every week, she had to readjust to the discomfort of tighter camisoles, new bras, occasional panty lines, and the lingering stares of junior girls who admired her sense of grooming.
Swathi and her circle treated her as one of their own - sharing lipstick shades, comparing sanitary pads, even borrowing each other’s deodorants during sweaty summer classes. One embarrassing moment came during a surprise dress code check: the PT teacher lifted her kurti hem slightly to check for proper undershorts and paused, raising an eyebrow.
“Hmm, very neat. As expected from Pavithra,” she said. The comment was harmless, but Pavithra's cheeks burned.
On another day, she got a minor cold and Swathi brought her a small steel container with hot kanji and murmured, “Drink this fast, dear. You’re too delicate these days.” Pavithra smiled weakly, unable to deny that she had become more sensitive, physically and emotionally.
Even her walk had changed - a slow sway that felt more natural now. Her gold anklets, still gifted by Arun, jingled subtly with every step.
At home, the changes were even more personal. The monthly rituals of threading her eyebrows, trimming split ends, and applying turmeric face packs were now muscle memory. She began sleeping in a cotton nighty, sometimes even in a soft sleeveless slip when the summer heat was unbearable. Her room smelled of coconut oil and rose talc. Her mirror reflected a girl with soft features, glossy hair in twin plaits, and a bindi that no longer felt like a costume.
She had dreams, some nostalgic, some erotic, some terrifying. In one, she was back to being Arun, shirtless and careless, riding a cycle fast through the village fields. In another, she was Pavithra, wearing a red half saree, holding Arjun’s hand and giggling like a bride.
And through it all, school, exams, temple visits, shopping days, Arjun remained close. Not overly forward, not forceful. Just present. Just watching.
Exam Fever and A Growing Bond:
As 12th standard entered its second term, pressure mounted. The school’s walls were covered in toppers' names and inspirational quotes. Teachers pushed harder. Tests every week. Extra classes. Assignments.
Pavithra studied hard. She topped Maths and chemistry with ease, worked extra hours with Swathi in physics. But computer science still troubled her. Arjun, though in a different school, came over sometimes to help her revise. They’d sit under a neem tree near her house, his notes open on his lap.
“You’re holding the pen wrong,” he teased, adjusting her fingers.
“Excuse me! This is my topper grip,” she smirked.
But in truth, she enjoyed the closeness. When he tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear during one of those study sessions, she didn't stop him.
The Secret Revealed:
A week after the board exams ended, Pavithra couldn’t take it anymore. That night, as the crickets chirped outside and the fan creaked lazily above them, she sat on the stone bench near the pond with Arjun.
“Arjun,” she began, her voice soft. “There’s something I need to tell you.”
He turned to her slowly. The moonlight made her cheeks shimmer. Her gold chain glinted gently.
“I wasn’t always… like this. I wasn’t born Pavithra.”
She explained everything. The illness, the scheme, the slow, inescapable transformation. Her voice cracked when she reached the part about her confusion, her guilt.
“I don’t know who I am anymore,” she whispered. “And yet… I don’t think I can go back either.”
There was silence. The pond glimmered.
Then Arjun, slowly, gently, took her hand.
“I’ve always known,” he said.
Her eyes widened.
“I didn’t know the full story, but… I knew you were different. And I still liked you. Pavithra or not, this… you… this is who I love.”
Tears welled in her eyes. She nodded, resting her head on his shoulder. They didn’t kiss that night. But it was the most intimate moment they had ever shared.
A Future Beyond: Chennai Bound:
When results came out, Pavithra had scored excellently. Arun, too, had done well in his carpentry course, and his small shop was now local favorite.
Arjun and Pavithra had both gotten admission into a prestigious arts and science college in Chennai. They were offered a shared dorm block boys and girls separate, but adjacent buildings.
Pavithra was hesitant.
“Chennai is big… What if people know?”
“You’ll be fine,” Arun said. “You’ve lived this far, thangachi. Go live the rest too.”
He gave her a chain with a small Ganesha pendant and ruffled her hair. “College la full stylish aa irukanum, okay?”
He waved as her bus left, his small moustache fluttering with his wide grin.
Pavithra, wearing a soft peach salwar and white sneakers, clutched Arjun’s hand tightly as they reached the dorm gates.
“I’m scared,” she said.
“Then stay close,” he smiled. “We’ll face it together.”
